yeah. got my group settled.. janice, linda, caroline and alan.. i'm happy with the arrangement.. was so relief that during the choosing of the "star", our group manage to stay as one.. and we are called "work hard".. and we got ourselves a volunteering secretary.. ms linda yang.. *cheers*

i'm feeling much better now.. after having some time alone.. but.. i'm sad to see my savings depleting at a rate that is quite unexpected... target to get it all back by.. march.. all back..

i'm the class rep of the class this sem.. how? all thanks to mr revi nair.. and his funny tactic of choosing.. holding a highlighter above the pic of the class.. with linda shifting the paper.. he dropped the highlighter.. and there.. my name was higlighted. and.. i'm also the group leader of work hard..

today is kinda like a loner day.. going to lectures alone.. to class at least there's still alan sitting next to me almost all the time so far in tutorials.. then it was so last min that i decide to go for a drink with mr D***** first time i've very been to a bar.. sua ku right.. well.. that's the way i am.. he treated to dinner at this really old place that is around since 1940.. and it is so olden style.. then went over to the chill bar to chill out.. (duh..) the place has a nice atmosphere.. nice music.. observant staff.. ( they came over to open another bottle of beer for me as soon as a finished one) FYI, we order a bucket of 5 heiniken bottles.. ya.. chatted quite a bit.. and somehow it went to the topic of BGR.. it will also be part of any kind of conversation huh.. oh well..

think tonight is the night that i really relaxed and chill out so far.. after so many nights of school, work, IG, driving.. time for me to do the things that i want to do.. thanks mr D*****...

how come i seem to be busier than i thought i will be this new sem? the start of a new semester has never been so busy and packed for me so far.. and the earliest that i reached home since last mon (the first day of sch) is 930pm..

work.. driving.. sch.. ig.. SA.. suddenly i'm so involved in so many things.. not that i'm complaining but perhaps i'm just not used to it? i dunno.. perhaps i'm just giving myself the stress and pressure unneccessarily..

yesterday was such an unlucky day.. the 2nd monday of the semester, the 2nd culinary lesson, and i cut my finger.. not once.. but twice.. and in a very super short interval of.. less than 1 minute.. it must be the fever.. was laughing at my situation.. and crying silently.. making use of the laugh to cry.. funny huh.. but it was painful la.. ( duh!! )

and then i left SA meeting late.. so i boarded the bus to CDC late.. and so i was late for driving, having to alight the bus halfway thru the journey (somewhere that i dunno) due to the super heavy traffic jam and took a cab.. with only 6.30 with me.. the fare came up to be 10 over bucks.. and i just gave the uncle all that i have..

after the driving lesson, wanted to go to the toilet, but i need 10 cents.. without a single cents on me, with no ATM machine around.. i felt so shagged.. carrying my super big bag with my safety shoes and culi uniform in it.. plus my knife set.. luckily i met my instructor who told the ah ne that i'm his friend, and i get to use the toilet for free.. then went going home, i couldn't find my ez link card.. it was somewhere hidden deep within the mess in my bag.. for that moment i thought i lost it and i will have to walk home.. but thank god i found it..

wad a day huh.. well.. life's like this..

and for today.. i went to sch for 4 hrs of tutorial straight.. dry but i made the effort to be attentive and listen in class.. i want to improve myself.. i felt so betrayed when i heard that arrangment of my group members has changed.. i thought it was somewhat confirmed.. now i've a bad feeling that i'm gonna have to get those people that i really dun wanna work with in my group... with this.. i guess there goes my confidence and morale to buck up for this semester.. F***...

and then there was the tourism ambassador interview thing.. ms daga said something about putting up an act.. that really triggered me off.. i couldn't control myself.. i just couldn't.. i went thru this issue with nic b4... and i thought it's kinda over.. but then i realised it today that it hasn't... has been already feeling quite down cos of the grouping thing.. as in really down.. and that sentence just had to come on the same day..

it's ok.. i guess.. time will heal it all.. hopefully..

found an excuse to not be called back to work on my off day..

went to marina square waraku to have dinner with my brother.. saw tim.. actually i already knew he was there cos yukari said he went back.. that's why they are short of one person to work tonight.. oh well.. all planned.. if i was not called back, i would have went to katong to eat instead of MS..

slacked at home.. listening to jay.. guess so far he is the one that i will really look for when i'm really down.. his song will without fail cheer me up a little.. feel so relaxed.. without any thing restraining me from doing the things i wanna do.. not like i did anything extreme.. just bringing my brother out to town..

guess i was really in a bad shape.. to break 1 red wine glass and a drinking glass in a row in a night.. a little glass chip entered my toe.. can't see it... but can't feel it as well..

i passed my final paper.. with a lot of worries i must say.. cos i din really prepared much and din do well for my trial test.. well, it's over anyway..

ya... i guess it's really over.. from the way things are going.. from the response i get.. i can feel it drifting away from me.. did i make a mistake? sometimes i wonder.. why am i so indecisive.. or maybe i should say, why is it so hard to know wad your heart is thinking..

my heart literally sank.. do u know? although i dun show it.. but who can understand?

i feel like i've just lost someone that i can bare my heart out to.. i tried to initiate the salvation.. and i'm still waiting for some response..

i'm feeling miserable.. drowning myself in work.. and beer.. i'm surprised by my own behaviour.. so dun ask me anything.. i still know wad i'm doing.. dun worry..

really dun worry.. just give me some time..

dad, mom, sis.. all in hongkong.. brother? in singapore.. but dunno where he is.. wasn't in the house when i woke up.. and i am all alone.. nvm.. used to it le..

niwae.. mark chay visited my workplace yesterday... look a bit plumper than on tv.. but oh well, who doesn't change?