wad a way to start the new year.. crying.. on the first day of 2005.. wad has happened to me? even in the past when i spent the day or special occasions alone i'd feel that it's no big deal.. why do i feel i have to answer for my actions to the people around me now and making myself so angry with myself for not being able to make people understand me?? i guess that's the difference when i have friends.. and that's the only thing that can console me now.. i have friends.. whether or not i've been treated as one, i dun wanna probe into the question.. just let me be a fool and allow me to believe that i have friends.. pls..

i've been trying allow people to understand it more.. but the more i try, the more disappointed and dejected i get.. i'm feeling very tired now.. really tired.. if i've been talking to u in a very irritating way, forgive me.. it's just me getting fed up talking to people..

and i find myself in my own world nowadays.. doing my job as my job, not as something that i enjoy.. applies same to my cca and school work.. to keep things short, it applies to everything and everything that i've been doing. i do it because i have to, and not because i want to.

heard that the singapore flag on the pole in Terminal two fell down today.. bad sign.. wad else is gonna happen next? i nv know who i can trust now.. esp after so many things have happened, kind faces might turn out to be the traitor that's always beside me..

blogs can't be trusted.. people come probing u about the content.. i'll still blog, but i've kept a personal diary where i'll without fail update it everyday about the things that i cannot say in my blog.. new year to all..